EXCLUSIVE: Brian Vahaly on coming to terms with his sexuality, dealing with hate and making tennis inclusive
When former world No.64 Brian Vahaly spoke openly about being gay in a podcast in 2017 he received over 1000 hate messages which included threats to take his children away. Yet he is resilient and hopes his journey to acceptance is one others will be inspired by.
America’s Brian Vahaly might have never won an ATP Tour title during his career but many consider him as a trailblazer in the world of tennis.
As a youngster the American showed immense promise on the junior Tour when he captured the Easter Bowl 18s title and broke into the world’s top 20. Following his success, Vahaly didn’t transition immediately to the Pro circuit and instead played college tennis in order to get his degree first. An approach which wasn’t as common back in the late 1990s as it is now. Representing the University of Virginia he earned All-American honours and reached the final of the prestigious NCAA championships whilst unseeded.
As a professional Vahaly peaked at a ranking high of 64th in the world and won five Challenger titles. During his career he played the likes of Michael Chang, Andre Agassi, Juan Carlos Ferrero, Lleyton Hewitt, Carlos Moya and Gustavo Kurten.
Towards the end of his career, injury started to hinder his performance on the Tour. The former college sports star retired in 2006 at the age of 27 but it was 11 years after that when he first spoke openly about being gay in a podcast. A courageous move Vahaly hopes will inspire others despite some of the negativity he received. He tells UbiTennis that following the podcast he shockingly received more than 1000 hate messages. In the Open Era there has never been an openly gay player participating in a Grand Slam tournament.
Now serving on the board of directors and thriving in the world of business, Vahaly speaks to UbiTennis about his journey to acceptance, making men’s tennis more welcoming to LGBT players, coping with his mental health as a player and many more topics.
Life as a player
UBITENNIS: You are a former world No.64 player who won five Challenger titles and played in seven Grand Slam main draws. What is the best memory of your career?
VAHALY: I think about it in a couple different ways. First, I was able to compete against Michael Chang, who was sort of my childhood role model. Being able to beat him was a personal achievement.
Secondly, reaching the quarter-finals of Indian Wells back in 2003 where I beat Juan Carlo Ferrero [who would have become world N.1 for eight weeks later that year], Fernando Gonzalez and Tommy Robredo. That was a big moment for me in my career.
UBITENNIS: Before you started life on the ATP Tour, you were also a regular on the college circuit.
VAHALY: I played at the University of Virginia and I was there for four years. I got my college degree and back then not a lot of college graduates were going on to the ATP Tour. There were only just a few. So I was proud at the time to be the only college graduate in the top 100.That has since changed considerably with John Isner and Steve Johnson among others. So it’s exciting to see more people going via the college route. For me personally getting my education (first) was very important to me.
Coming to terms with his sexuality
UBITENNIS: Towards the end of your career you suffered from injury and previously said you needed to be away from the sport in order to deal with issues concerning your personal life. Why did you feel the need to leave the sport completely in order to address your personal issues?
VAHALY: It was a rotator cuff issue and I had a bunch of surgeries. At that time most careers were done by the time players reached their late 20s. Obviously a lot has changed with some of my peers still playing when I thought it was time to exit.
I started to come to terms with my sexuality, and I was trying to understand who I am. I just didn’t feel safe or included in the sports field. More specifically tennis, it was a very conservative environment. So for me, when I stopped playing I very much disappearedfrom my friends, my tennis world and even my family a little bit. That way I could figure out more about myself and what I wanted. It’s a self-exploration process for sure and at the time I didn’t feel like tennis was a safe enough space for me to do that.
UBITENNIS: You said tennis was a very conservative environment for you. What do you mean by this?
VAHALY: There were a lot of homophobic jokes made on Tour. It’s a very masculine and competitive environment. You don’t see a lot of gay representation, except for the women’s Tour. With me not having the personality of an outspoken advocate (for LGBT issues), certainly not in my twenties, I needed some time to understand myself. To me, in tennis I didn’t feel like there was anybody to talk to or anybody that was going through anything similar.
UBITENNIS: Do you ever wonder how different your career might have been if you publicly came out whilst still playing?
VAHALY: I don’t allow myself to think about it because I don’t want to think about ‘what if’. I do wonder if I would have been able to play more freely and maybe the quality of my tennis would have improved. But I do know during that time in the 2000s I would have felt very uncomfortable travelling internationally. There were certain countries which used to be very unwelcoming towards gay people in general.
To me there was a risk component to coming out, as well as a financial fear. How would sponsorships respond? You sort of don’t know what you don’t know. When you worked 25 years as a tennis player it was just a risk I wasn’t willing to take.
“People were telling me they knew where I live and they were coming to take my children away”
UBITENNIS: Nowadays there is a lot of talk about mental health concerning players such as Naomi Osaka. 15 years ago these discussions weren’t as prominent, so how did managed to cope personally with life on the Tour?
VAHALY: When I was on the Tour I had a sports psychologist, a woman called Alexis Castorri. She has worked with a lot of Grand Slam champions. She was really influential for me in terms of getting the most out of my tennis career and after I finished competing. Helping my transition from the Tour and coming to terms with my sexuality.
Mental health is critical to me. I’ve had a psychologist now for 19 years. I continue to do it (use these services) and I will always have tremendous support for anybody who wants to prioritise that aspect of their life.
UBITENNIS: It was back in 2017 when you spoke publicly about your sexuality for the first time. Were you expecting the kind of reaction you received?
VAHALY: I knew it was important for me to speak my truth when given the opportunity. I just wanted to say it and move on a little bit. I didn’t foresee myself being an advocate. But I didn’t want to feel like I was hiding and there was a part of me, even though I was already married, felt like I was hiding from the sports world. That was a process for me.
After having kids, it changed the way I thought about everything and I felt I needed to step up in a way. I’m very much an introvert, so I was quite happy living a very private life but kids have a way of changing your priorities.
UBITENNIS: Ever since you have opened up about your sexuality, have you heard from any other athletes seeking help or advice?
VAHALY: There has been no word from tennis players, which is fine. I certainly did hear from people that I grew up playing college and junior tennis with. But not on the Pro Tour.
After the podcast came out I got quite a significant amount of negative e-mails. Probably a little over 1000 messages from people who were very disgusted by the fact two men were having children (together). A lot of really strong hate came in my direction. Where I was fortunate is that I came out later in life and I was well prepared for that kind of hate so it didn’t necessarily impact me the same way.
When people were telling me they knew where I live and they were coming to take my children away, it was a little scary. My experience was not entirely filled with warm and fuzzy acceptance.
I have to be understanding that there is a significant part of the United States and the world who do not believe it is acceptable the way my family lives. I have to be OK with that. Part of what sports prepare you for is adversity and dealing with people who are tough.
ATP far from perfect when it comes to LGBT inclusivity
UBITENNIS: On the ATP Tour there are no openly LGBT members which may or may not be a coincidence. Do you feel the men’s Tour needs to do more to make the sport more welcoming?
VAHALY: If you look at what the NFL and NBA is doing compared to what the ATP is doing – it’s not really the same. One of the reasons why I serve on the board of directors on the USTA is to change the US Open. How can we have a Pride day? How can we have events and visibly show we support it? The USTA and US Open have taken some great strides over the last two years.
I do believe the ATP, certainly as the governing body of men’s professional tennis, if they were more open and accepting in their messaging, it would help. At this stage they have chosen not to do that.
I will say that the Australian Open has done an exceptional job and I hope that continues to expand. I’m not looking to go into these environments and preach, I’m just trying to promote visibility and acceptance so LGBT people feel that they can join the sport.
UBITENNIS: When it comes to LGBT sports the big story in recent days has been NFL player Carl Nassib coming out. How important is it?
VAHALY: They (NFL and tennis) are different sports but I think it helps. NFL in the United States is one of the most macho sports out there. Seeing how the fans and teams react is really important.
I thought Carl handled it very well. He posted about it (coming out) and moved on. It doesn’t need to be a big topic of conversation. I believe this as well, which is why I went with the podcast.
That just continues to change hearts and minds around the country. When people can see them (gay athletes) out there competing, just as tough and just as successful in the athletics sphere. It (change of views) happens slowly but I think certainly all athletes are paying attention to acceptance levels and the reactions of your teammates.
Advice to others and what the future holds
UBITENNIS: Given all that you have been through. What advice would you give to somebody else who may be going through what you once experience?
VAHALY: Find somebody to talk to, somebody you trust. Know that people like us are there if you have questions. It’s just nice to have somebody to talk to who can help you learn about yourself. What I try to do is in terms of putting my family forward is that we live a pretty ‘normal life.’ I have two kids, I have a house and I walked my kids to preschool this morning. It doesn’t have to be such a defining characteristic of who you are. In the sports world, it feels that it is magnified, but what I want to show is that you can have a great athletic career, meet somebody and have a family no matter your sexuality.
UBITENNIS: So now you’re have been retired from the Tour for a few years, would you consider returning in the form of a coach or mentor if an opportunity arises?
VAHALY: I honestly don’t think I would be a great coach. I am pretty good at strategy but as it relates to technique and mechanics. It’s just not my skill set. I have moved into the business world and I like it. I have had some great success with life outside of tennis.
Also, I don’t know if travel would appeal to me any more. It worked as a single guy in his twenties but in a family with kids I want to spend time at home raising my boys.
If I can be helpful to athletes by giving my input on mental toughness, strategy and things I feel that I excelled at which got me to a high level (as a tennis player). I am always happy to share my point of view.
UBITENNIS: So what have you learned as a tennis player which has helped you in the world of business?
VAHALY: I love tennis and what it taught me in terms of dealing with defeat, victory, changing strategies, different variables and crisis management. What it has done for me is that I am very competitive in the working world but I also have very good intuition and decision making skills. I have found that transitioning into the work environment from sport, that some people are a lot smarter than I am but they are using the wrong pieces of information to make a decision. I credit all my business success to the traits I learned on the tennis court.
————
Vahaly now lives in Washington with his husband Bill Jones and they are parents of two twin boys. He currently is the Chief Executive Officer of Youfit Health Clubs.
Mats Wilander tells the 2024 story: Sinner is ready to win a Slam, but probably Djokovic is going to win them all [Exclusive]
“Winning the Davis Cup and beating Djokovic triggered something in Jannik” says former world No.1 and Discovery analyst Mats Wilander on the eve of the Australian Open.
It’s never easy to be successful in a second career after retiring from competition, especially after achieving extraordinary results. Yet in the case of Mats Wilander, it can be said that his adventure as a pundit for Eurosport/Discovery has certainly been lavish with satisfaction. Of course, it is difficult to surpass yourself when you have been No. 1 in the world and have won 7 Grand Slam titles, three of which in that magical year, 1988, the first year the Australian Open was played on the courts of Melbourne Park.
In an exclusive meetup with Ubitennis the Swedish champion was willing to converse on the topic which with us Italians could only be one, first and foremost: Jannik Sinner who is ready in the starting blocks, amid all the expectations in the wake of his exceptional end of the 2023. For sure Mats appeared to be brimming with excitement for the start of a new great year of tennis.
“The Australian Open is always the most interesting Grand Slam because players have had a little bit of a break and you don’t know who had a great offseason and what kind of confidence they have from the 2023 season. There’s the confidence for Jannik Sinner: does it carry him through to the next season? Because he had an unbelievable finish of 2023 and does that confidence stay with him 1 1/2 months later?”
But where did Sinner’s improvements stem from? Wilander believes it all started with the quality of his service.
“We knew that his game was there. We knew that he is always improving something small here and there. Now he’s improved something big because the serve in the men’s and women’s game is one of the most important shots in the game again,” he said.
“I should say again because there was a time when… For Roger Federer it was important for sure but when Rafa Nadal was winning everything with Novak right there and Andy Murray, the serve wasn’t that important. They were physically very strong, they were very clever, they had no weaknesses in everything else and I think the way the game is going the serve is becoming very very important because you have to get some free points on your service game.”
“The guys are too good at hitting balls, they’re too good at covering the court today. Jannik Sinner improved his serve and that’s one of the hardest shots to improve and he improved his serve so much that he is suddenly as dangerous as Alexander Zverev with a big serve, Daniil Medvedev with a big serve. Suddenly he has that same weapon. We know how well he hits the ball, how well he competes, how well he moves, but he didn’t serve that well and now he does.”
“Carlos Alcaraz needs to improve his serve and when he does, then suddenly he’s going to be nearly impossible to beat. But Jannik with this serve improvement is hot he’s such a great player today, yeah such a great player.”
The real question is whether the level Jannik displayed in the 2023 autumn indoor swing (as well as outdoors in Asia) can be maintained when playing not only best of five matches but also having to cope with the tough Australian summer heat. And if he were not to win here in Australia, could 2024 be the year for his first Major? The three-time AO winner has little doubt.
“This year for sure and even in Australia. He’s had great Grand Slam tournaments. He could have won the US Open when he had a match point against Carlos Alcaraz. I believe he had a good chance of beating Casper Ruud if he had got to play him in the final.” He said.
“So I think that with his win against Novak in Davis Cup and obviously with the win in Turin as well I think that there he has proof in his mind “OK, I can beat the greatest player of all time”. I think learning how to play five sets for some players takes a little bit longer than other players and I think that there are a lot of little things that have to happen along the way and two very important things have happened to him: he beat the best player in the world at home and he won Davis Cup playing for his country. I think he’s going to learn so much from those situations that it’s going to translate into the Australian Open 100% for sure.”
“For sure now Australia and the conditions are the most complicated conditions that we have most probably in any Grand Slam.At the Australian Open, you have to be a little bit lucky and unfortunately for Jannik he is name is not Novak Djokovic. Djokovic will most probably play five matches out of seven at night and it’s cooler, there’s no sun and that is a big advantage for Novak Djokovic. Now it’s not unfair because he deserves to have that advantage. He’s proven that he is the one people want to watch so let’s put Novak at night most of the time. Roger Federer had the same situation. Rafa Nadal often had the same situation, so Jannik unfortunately is still kind of early in his career so he’s going to play.”
“One day he’s going to play at 1:00 in the afternoon, and it’s going to be 40°. The next match is going to play at 7:00 at night and it’s going to be 15°. The next match he is going to play indoors because it’s 50° and they have to close the roof. You have to be very able to adjust to the conditions and that’s the part with Jannik that I’ve seen improvements: he adjusted his serve, he’s adjusted sometimes hitting drop shots with a forehand, he’s adjusted becoming a much better volleyer, he’s even adjusted to be a great doubles player so he’s done so many smaller adjustments that another adjustment for him being the conditions in Australia I think it’s just a matter of time and I think time has come.”
“I think that he is up there with the 4 favourites to win the Australian Open. The number one is Novak Djokovic 100% for sure. Number 2 for me is Carlos Alcaraz and Jannik Sinner and then at number 3 comes Zverev, Tsitsipas, Medvedev, and Holger Rune. There are a lot of players that are right behind but to me, he belongs in that second group with Carlos Alcaraz being the favourites. Novak Djokovic is the clear favourite for sure.”
Since Djokovic is his clear favourite, we asked Mats if the Serb’s form may dip in 2024, after missing once again by a hair’s breadth, as in 2021, the calendar year Grand Slam last year.
“Most probably he had a good chance of winning Wimbledon. He had a good chance of winning the US Open when he lost to Daniil Medvedev. OK not on the day. on the day Medvedev was a human wall. (For) Novak maybe the pressure and the pressure was more in that final against them because it was the last Grand Slam they had. At Wimbledon, there was less pressure because yes, he was the favourite to win, but you never know. So I think
“And the matches that he loses on the tour, they are two out of three sets. In Grand Slams three out of five he just doesn’t lose tennis matches to the young guys because he understands how to play defence and when to play defence. Like last year he was a little bit injured in his right leg and what does he do? He hit his forehand harder last year in Australia than he’s ever hit his forehand before. So he knows how to make these adjustments on the day, in the moment, and maybe that’s what we are still waiting for Jannik Sinner to be able to: in the moment make these adjustments that work out in his favour.”
“Nobody knows how to do that so I see no reason why again I’m going to predict that he wins all four slams because I predicted it a couple of years ago, I predicted it last year. I have been wrong, but it’s been very very very close, and I think that there’s a really really really good chance that he wins all four this year. I really do.”
So, the way Mats Wilander sees it, also 2024 is not bound to be a turning point. Yet, if his predictions were to miss the mark, it may be an Italian player who shall prove him wrong…
Lorenzo Musetti – ATP Sofia 2023 (photo: Ivan Mrankov)
Our correspondent in Sofia interviewed Italian talent Lorenzo Musetti, who is taking on Jack Draper this afternoon
Lorenzo Musetti is the top seed in the ATP 250 that together with Metz closes the season of “regular” tournaments, just before the ATP Finals in Turin. Exempted from the first round, he’s waiting to make his debut in the Bulgarian capital where last year at the beginning of October he was halted in the semifinals by Marc-Andrea Huesler, the future winner of the tournament. With our correspondent in Sofia, Ivan Mrankov, he compared this season with 2022, but also about the Davis Cup, and Jannik Sinner.
“Greetings from Ubaldo. It’s the last tournament, how do you rate your season? Was it maybe less positive than last year when you won two tournaments? But there are improvements in all areas of your game and it’s also normal for younger players to have a less rewarding year after their first breakthrough. Do you feel improved, do you think it was a positive season?”
“It’s not been an easy season, but as you said, it’s also been a season in which I have been settling in. In the middle part I was able to find a very good continuity in terms of results. Of course, it started off a bit badly. As I had played so much at the end of last season, it was perhaps more complicated to start the new year in high gear. So it took me a while to get going, I played very well from Monte Carlo. Let’s say it was a season with few peaks. Last year, the weeks in Hamburg, Naples, Paris-Bercy were very high in terms of level.”
“For sure I feel improved in terms of tennis and physically, I’m working hard, even if people sometimes only see the results but not what’s behind them. It was a season of firsts. Even if we consider the example of Jannik, last year he had a season of adaptation, different from the standards he has displayed on court this year. And I also hope next year to be more focused, more concrete in terms of results, attitude and everything.”
“You’re part of the Davis Cup team again this year, so your season will end pretty late. Do you think you’ll be able to prepare better than last year as you have the same amount of time to rest and train? And last question, what do you think your chances for Davis are? Since the USA, Russia, Spain are missing… Our editor wrote that Italy is the favourite along with Djokovic’s Serbia.”
“I think other teams as well, like Australia and Canada who won last year. The Davis Cup is a unique event, not always the team with the best ranked players comes out the winner. And the doubles rubber is fundamental. Having Jannik in our team gives us a great hand. I think he’s playing his best tennis right now. I wish him all the best in Turin and that he can join us as late as possible. It’s a huge boost for us.
“In terms of preparation, almost all the players have a month, December, to prepare for Australia. Unfortunately, when we all play so much, we have to adapt. We could do with more days off and obviously more weeks to load, work and prepare for the season. But you have to be good at making do with what we’ve got. And also, during the year, we have to specially focus on maintaining injury prevention.”
EXCLUSIVE: Saudi Arabia’s Plans For Hosting The Next Gen Finals
Tennis is heading to the country following weeks of speculation. Although there is likely to be some criticism coming amid the intention of organisers to hold the event during the offseason in December from 2024 onwards.
Sources have confirmed to Ubitennis that the ATP Next Gen Finals will be moved to Saudi Arabia from this year onwards with the inaugural event taking place immediately after the Davis Cup Finals.
Jeddah will be the event’s host city which features the eight highest-ranked players under the age of 21. According to those familiar with the situation, the 2023 edition had initially been planned to take place in December but had to be brought forward due to the FIFA Club World Cup tournament which will be hosted at the same venue. It wasn’t confirmed until last month that the football tournament will be played in Jeddah in what was described to Ubitennis as a ‘last-minute change.’
The prospect of hosting the tournament immediately after the Davis Cup finals could be problematic at the end of a long season. However, this situation is trying to be played down as a one-off.
It will be held on at the King Abdullah Sports City where the venue has six tennis courts just outside the main stadium, as well as another indoor arena that can hold up to 12,000 people. Other events to have been hosted there include the 2021 International Handball Federation Men’s Super Globe tournament, as well as a boxing match between Oleksandr Usyk and Anthony Joshua.
What is the most striking aspect of the plans is the report that from 2024 the Next Gen finals will take place over a week during the second part of December which is in the middle of the off-season. It is unclear why the ATP have pushed for such a thing to occur and why they have agreed to this. During the bidding process for a host city, they said the following in March:-
‘This year’s tournament is expected to take place in December, with the exact dates to be determined with the successful bidder.’
One explanation for such a date might be the number of exhibition events that take place in the Middle East during this time. So instead of players participating in them, they would play this event. However, the idea of expanding an already long Tour calendar is one that will attract criticism. Plus there is yet to be any public response from players who might influence the current plans.
ATP CEO Andrea Gaudenzi recently told The Financial Times that ‘positive’ talks have taken place with officials from Saudi Arabia. Meanwhile, WTA boss Steve Simon visited the country earlier this year and was said to be highly impressed. It appears that both governing bodies are interested in investment from the country as long as it doesn’t have significant implications on the Tour’s structure which has happened in other sports.
Saudi Arabia’s Public Investment Fund has invested heavily in sports, including the £300M takeover of football team Newcastle United. In golf, they funded the LIV Tour which split the sport before a shock merger between the Tour’s was announced a few weeks ago.
Critics have accused the Middle Eastern nation of using sport to help improve its image which has been marred by allegations of human rights violations. This is commonly known as sportswashing.
One of those concerns is related to LGBT players playing in the country. A Saudi official told Ubitennis that gay players or media members would be welcome with their partners as long as they respect local culture. Basically, public displays of homosexuality will not be encouraged and could prompt a backlash from locals.
“I think the WTA is going to make sure that we are in a safe environment,”openly gay player Greet Minnen told Ubitennis. “All the LGBT players are wise enough to not provoke anything or hold hands when we are not at the (tennis) club.’ “I think we have to respect the culture there but it’s not going to be an issue as the WTA will make sure it is a safe environment for us.”
The Next Gen finals began in 2017 and had been hosted in Milan until now. Previous winners include Jannik Sinner, Carlos Alcaraz and Brandon Nakashima.
It is understood that a contract confirming the relocation of the event to Saudi Arabia will be signed next month.
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